Another update for my weird dream journal:
I was in this really hopping club that played everything: crunkcore, classical, atmospheric, reggae, Tuvan throat singing, shranz, country and western, funk, taiko drums, thrash, rap, and everybody was maypoling about. I went to order a drink from the bartender when the guy in front of me keeled over because his golden elixir (did I mention the bartender was a Taoist magician?) had added a little too much mercury. I'm really seriously thirsty but I neither want to live forever nor die right there so I rush off to the bathroom for a sink drink except there's so much traffic I get trapped on the dance floor.
I realize I'm surrounded by all these spiritual figures: devas, and saints, and culture heroes (for instance, Bob Marley and Cuchulainn) and it's only making me thirstier and they're doing a cross between a congo line and a circle dance so I'm having to do a lot of dodging and weaving and I'm still not getting anywhere.
There was this bit about millennial Jesus but instead of 'Jesus Saves' it was 'Jesus Raves" He had glowstick stigmata and he appeared to really enjoy dubstep. He was handing out tabs of Molly because, you know, Jesus loves you and he wants you to love him too. But I remembered seeing something about the dehydration aspect being potentially deadly so I wouldn't take any and he was all sad.
Later, the DJ said 'And now we give a great shout out to Enoch, Moses, Elijah, Ezekiel, and John: trippin' balls for the Lord' right before he played this song and a troupe of dervishes took over the dance floor.
I never did get that drink.

When I get short sleep and know it's going to be short my unconscious tends to go hog wild, shredding my recent daily experience into chum for the sleep sharks. As follows:
1) I partake of a LARP extravaganza that ensues inside a mall with a cruise ship mounted on its roof, like if Mall of America decided to strap on pontoons and go to sea.
2)This LARP appears to be some cthonic melding of Star Wars: Clone Wars, Lord of the Rings, and Cabin in the Woods. I realize none of these explain the presence of the mimes but they were there anyway. (Don't ask me, I was ASLEEP, ok?!?)
3)I learn (by grim example, not mine, thank God) that leaping madly from the smoke stack of a cruise liner into its open central section, shouting 'Eat my thunderstick you alliance scum!' without checking to see if your zip line is actually zippy is a tragicomic way to die.
4)I overhear a conversation between 2 adult players in the children's fun area that goes something like this:
'Zeke, aren't these the most precious little redneck zombies you've ever seen in your life?'
'Ma, I venture to say it will be a pure pleasure to be consumed by these undead children.'
5)The term 'scrufulous fuckwidget' becomes an expression of ultimate disdain and once I achieve consciousness I agree wholeheartedly.
By and large, this was one of my better efforts and one of a handful of times I've actually woken myself up laughing.